If I was a girl, I would sit around defenseless and allow you treat me with utter disdain. I will let you get into my head so much that everything I do will become a reflection of you. I will look to you for approval before doing anything

If I was a girl, I will allow you hit me and believe that I deserved it and you did that for my own good. I will never speak until spoken to. We will have monologues (you talk, I listen). I will never question any of your ideas because I wouldn’t know better.

If I was a girl, I will cry daily. Helpless in my unhappiness; but too weak to make a move. I dare not be assertive because that may upset you and what will my life be without you?

If I was a girl, I will never think of improving myself for fear of being better than you. You will be allowed to choose my friends and allow me hang out with them only when you are present. My phone calls will be recorded and everyone on my contact list has to be approved by you

If I was a girl, I would never seek to make your life better because you are already ‘perfect’. I will watch you drown in your own ignorance but never lend a helping hand. I will always ‘take’ from you without replenishment. You will be my treasure chest; all I need do is make demands

If I was a girl, your future won’t matter to me. After all, your job is to take care of me. All I need do is sit and look pretty. I will question your need to save or invest money as against my wants.

If I was a girl, I will treat us as separate entities not requiring unison to move forward. You cannot share your goals and aspirations with me because I will not have any contribution to make. All I care about is my wants being met

But I am not a girl… I am a woman who knows her worth and while I will not rub it in your face; I am not afraid to be strong. I know what I want and I am not afraid to go after it. I am submissive but not stupid. I listen but also offer suggestions. I will not be abused or brain washed, I am equally a human being with feelings

I will respect you and support your dreams and aspirations. I will treat us as a complete unit, so hurting you will be hurting me. I will argue sometimes not because I am being rude, but because I respect you too much to allow you go downhill

As a woman, I understand our different roles and will never cross my boundaries. I will be your friend, sister, mother, wife, partner… everything to make us better people. I will let you take care of me but I will ensure that you never run dry either physically, emotionally, spiritually or financially. I am you, you are us, and we are one

So next time you walk up to me, make sure you are clear on what you want. A girl or a woman?